I’m sorry if this is a socially inept question but who in the world starts to reconcile with a person over a long term issue by accusing them of harassment towards another person within the first three texts? To me, that is not reconciliation where I would not be offended and become uncooperative, as much I try not to. I have my right as anyone else does to get upset if the first topic of discussion is me being accused of something I did not do. I do not wish to be rudely approached by the significant other of the victim when there is most certainly another way to go about the situation. I would have understood if the victim were to harshly tell me off as it was my fault and I should do whatever I can to fix the mistakes I made. I would have understood if the victim’s significant other harshly told me off as well. The one thing I will never accept is being told of, accused of, and insulted by, after doing a huge mistake, within essentially a single breath by someone who will seem to just run head first into every situation they get involved in.

Written on November 22, 2016 before being told of my uncle’s death. 

Was still reeling from anger of being insulted during a reconciliation that took a wrong turn. I have considered points mentioned in a formal letter about taking on a victim complex and should have used experience to learn about systems, group dynamics, and interpersonal relationships. I have never been truly angry that the former friend told her significant other that I wanted to sue the two of them. I understood that the former friend had to, as much as I wanted to hide my stupidity at the time. The only thing I disliked the most about the situation was that I allowed myself to act complementary to someone I would consider to be extremely dominant and hostile to me. That kind of person is now a person I would never want to confront with ever again as I have seen that my irrationality has the potential to get the best of me. I am tired and of everything that came out of the relationship, I only care for my tarot cards now. I may still worry about the former friend but like mother said just an hour ago about my late uncle, I have to let them go. I will be making contact with the kohai of the group one last time to see if they can deliver several items of the former friend that I borrowed, along with a thank-you and farewell present when it comes in. It’s a picture that I believed to sum up most of our interaction with each other… Oh right, the kohai also still has some of my Rezzard cards. Need to get those back from them soon… Might as well give a Christmas present to them anyway. The poor kid (yes, I know that they are only one or two years younger than me. I do not care) having to deal with such a screwed up situation. 

I am tired and am considering just shutting down this circus/blog. 


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